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Thursday, July 23, 2015

Another View the world changes around us

Whether we like it or not, the world changes around us... constantly..if you ponder that for a moment.
I am in a thoughtful mode, more depth than my usual thinking...
As I have mentioned 2 friends are into very serious illness & it can be hard to know just how to be...
well.... you be yourself & you stay put...hold the pattern.... 
even though right up confronting you also is
one's own mortality.
and 
it is the anniversary of my Mum's death today....
you know I have this feel I hope she isn't lonely...
I am not there to visit her grave today....


With your friends who are not doing as well as others who just need some constant in their lives, so walk with them, chat....& let them talk, if it is uncomfortable for you... these visits, calls etc are not just about you now.


I know how some friends just desert people at such critical stages in their lives.... leaving them feeling pretty used up that somehow because things change you are no longer of any use.... 
So check your vision....


I didn't arrive here for those words but they need to be said constantly.....
it's more serious than a new lounge suite 
or 
the latest text on the phone of where you are right now.


Which is how all this began...
While I was waiting at an appointment this morning
A client was saying she'd have a card for next appointment as her phone was not reminding her....The youthful receptionist said she has everything on her phone & how she'd be lost without it ...

I puzzle over such statements so I asked the receptionist  is this how she always plots her day.... yes 
I mentioned how I write stuff on a list or my calendar my references bases that USUALLY I do remember once my handwriting connects to the brain.

So into my appointment & the person & I always have interesting conversations...
We talk of re negotiating one's own life as adjustments occur around us...
I ,for one am aging ie I am getting older & I hate the diminishing view for my life...
I am at that stage where what do I plan to do now ..where will I live what do I need that life...& then friends change tack ...& that changes part of the constants in life as we walk this finer line of living day today.


I thought I need newer LIFE SKILLS
a new VISION BOARD half way through the year ? YES YES....
Writing what I want.... I am doing that after a generous prompt from Flow Magazine
I might need to draw my surface map ( yet again )
&
journal it...
Being a Life Coach for myself...
After 2 chance conversations about parts of life & the way we do things...
suddenly gave me the starting point.
to seek different solutions.

I have also gained so much from wandering along with both of my dear friends conversations go in all sorts of directions ..I laugh, then think Oh should I laugh now... but I have also seen within myself I am fairly optimistic as an outlook, (sure things P me off ....) 
and they draw energy from that at a time when their energy is low...this isn't forced cheerfulness ( I hate that )


I learnt some things when My Dad had his first stroke 
lost his sight & was asking for me ...
ME ????
I asked my Mother...
Why does he want me to be there???


I was quite estranged from my Father & had been for many decades... besides he was sicker than other times now 
& I am not confident in this..I did do all those thoughts, but ..
I went
I walked into the ward he was in, 
his giant of a man in a tiny single bed...


As a very young child I had bonded with him before other things just got in the way ( still do even in memory at times )
But I drew on that..he was a huge reader & suddenly he could not read..
I cannot recall how I talked to him but went home to ponder how to bring the world back to him.
As I collected flowers from their garden I was collecting topics to describe & for him to touch & smell...


So we got connection in a more meaningful way.
later his sight came back fleetingly & came back for him to read letters I wrote to him for 5 more years before he died 
& he wrote back..
I would collect interesting snippets to write in big texta pen for him to read for himself... 
when he died I found I still collected snippets to tell him but of course he was gone
I think you have much to think over as I also do now